


At a Crossroads

by writefrommyheart69



Category: Twilight, Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Accountantward, Anal, F/M, Heavy Petting, Jews who work in finance, Quirky Girl, Sex positions that a girl with scoliosis is gonna regret, cum on hands, enthusiastic blowjob, habla español, street screeching, times square elmo, x-ray shots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:40:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23184175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writefrommyheart69/pseuds/writefrommyheart69
Summary: Edward Cullen is tired of his dull life as an accountant until he meets the free-spirited Bella Swan and embarks on a journey that neither of them will ever forget. LEMONS GALORE. ONESHOT.
Relationships: Edward Cullen/Bella Swan





	At a Crossroads

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Moses](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moses/gifts).



I didn't need to look back at the reception desk to know that the woman sitting behind it was watching me. She's our hotel's newest recruit. Victoria or Veronica...something like that. She's the prototypical new hire: fresh out of college with eyes that are too bright for comfort. The phone rang, and she answered it with a "Volturi Hotels and Resorts, this is Victoria speaking, how can I help you?"

It had been a busy morning for her. The phone had been ringing off the hook since I first stepped into the office. None of us could have anticipated the success that this hotel has seen. The location was risky to begin with. The surrounding neighborhood is quiet and residential. There are no sights to see or reasons to choose us over The Holiday Inn. People do not come to this town by choice. However, the numbers in front of me suggested otherwise.

It's a mystery as to what attracted the owners to this area. Perhaps they enjoy a good gamble. If it had been me put in charge of choosing the location, the land we currently occupy would have been thrown off the table and replaced with options closer to the city. Our boss, Aro, regards me as a straightlaced man. It's not a particularly accurate description for a man who merely prefers safe bets, such as majoring in accounting and setting a clear career path. Admittedly, the job is not the most entertaining, but I live comfortably.

Victoria hung up the phone and walked towards me. I ducked my head, fearful that she may take even the slightest bit of eye contact as an invitation. My efforts proved useless as she stopped in front of my desk, fingers fidgeting. "Edward?"

I looked up. "Yes?"

"Aro wants to see you in his office."

I tilted my head in curiosity before walking upstairs to the second floor. Aro left his office door wide open for me. "Was sending a messenger really necessary? You could have reached me directly."

Aro chuckled, leaning into the back cushion of his swivel chair. "I'm sure the messenger didn't mind." I rolled my eyes. He readjusted himself and resumed the professional facade. "Did you secure the payment from McBergstein?"

"In the process of finalizing it," I responded, matching his polished tone.

"And Levi?"

"Secured as of last night."

"Nicely done." Aro rose from his seat. "Have you had lunch yet?"

We walked four blocks down the street to our favorite sandwich joint. Aro waited until we were situated at our table to say what had been lingering on his mind. "Victoria seems interested in you."

"A little too interested." My annoyance was evident.

"You should spend some time with her, get to know her better," he continued dismissively. "She said she's free tonight."

I shook my head. "When did you become the office matchmaker?"

"The same time you voluntarily started pulling late nights at the office." Despite the odd approach, he seemed genuinely concerned. "At least give her a chance, Edward. Would it kill you to do that?"

I took a moment to choose my words carefully. "Victoria isn't my type."

"And what type is that?"

"It's hard to say exactly what I'm looking for." The words escaped me. Victoria has an undeniably pretty face and her youthful enthusiasm is refreshing. I'll give her that much. As refreshing as it may be, it's only a matter of time until the corporate world hits her hard. It happened to all of us, but nobody wants to acknowledge it. Aro stared at me expectantly. "I want a woman who's exciting, a free spirit." I shifted uneasily, realizing how ridiculous it sounded.

A playful smile grew on Aro's face. "Take your head out of the clouds, Edward." He nudged my shoulder, and we moved on to lighter conversation.

We returned to the office, and I soon became engrossed in the myriad of documents spread in front of me. The hours passed quickly. It took too long for me to realize that Victoria and I were the only ones left in the room. She was free to leave over an hour ago. Instead, she stayed here, incessantly tapping a pen against her desk.

She broke the silence. "It's Friday."

"It is," I responded, not wanting to be rude while also not wanting to initiate further conversation.

Her voice went up an octave, "Do you have any plans tonight?"

"I have work to finish." It technically could have been pushed until Monday without consequence, but Victoria didn't have to know that.

"Well, after you finish, want to go out for drinks? Have you ever been to McQueen's? It's pretty nice. My friends and I have been there a few times." I pretended not to notice her lips purse. "Or maybe, if you know a better place…"

Part of me felt it would be best to nip this in the bud by rejecting her outright. The other part feared that doing so would jeopardize our professional relationship. I turned to face her. "Sorry, I already made plans."

"Oh." There was a trace of disappointment in her eyes. "What kind of plans?"

"I'm meeting a friend later."

"Anyone I would know?"

"No. It's an old friend of mine."

"I see." Her mouth curved into a forced smile. "It's okay. Let me know if anything changes."

Victoria was first to call it a night. I soon followed and took my Lexus through the backroads. I know this route like the back of my hand. My halfway home marker is the giant billboard with Kumail Nanjiani advertising some movie that came out three years ago. There was a green light at the intersection ahead, but the car in front of me remained at a standstill. Its blinkers weren't on. My hand hovered over the horn until the driver in front slowly moved up. He then deliberately swerved to the right, eventually straightening out to continue onward. Clearly he noticed something that I didn't. I inched forward to survey the dark roads, expecting to find a deer or stray dog.

But I never could have prepared myself for her.

Out there, in the patch of dark road, stood a woman wearing a red, feathery suit that covered her body from neck to toe. Her face was turned away, giving me a view of her long, chestnut hair. I helplessly watched her from behind my steering wheel, internally begging her to turn around.

And when she did, had I not been sitting, I would have dropped to my knees.

This woman was absolutely breathtaking. An unfamiliar sensation formed in my chest. My sight was stuck on her, as if she was reeling me in, compelling me to get closer, reach out, and touch her. It was frightening, euphoric, and clearly a sign of my overactive imagination. Approaching her now would be wrong, borderline intrusive. Still, I couldn't justify leaving her here in the middle of the street.

Her lips opened wide and let out a mix of howling and screeching. She's truly divine, a free spirit.

My excitement got ahold of me. I couldn't walk away even if I tried. My body began moving on its own accord, forcing me to abandon my car. The driver of the sedan behind me got on his feet as well. "Hey what's the hold up?" he yelled.

Against my better judgement, I grabbed him, swept him around and sang, "There she is, the love of my life!"

He squirmed and belligerently screamed, "Hey man! Get off me!"

I released him and made way for her. The closer I got to her the harder it was to breath. I was utterly entranced by her beauty. She continued howling with reckless abandon, eyes looking in my general direction but not at me. I ran my hand from her forehead back towards her ear, searching for signs that my affection was unwelcome. There wasn't a single one. Her body reacted as if it had been expecting my touch.

I inched closer to her, inhaled her scent, and whispered into her ear, "It's okay. You're safe with me."

The words left an unpleasant aftertaste in my mouth. Could I really promise her that? Could I really trust myself to shield her from all the dangers that inhabit our world. The uncertainty was agonizing. A series of what-if scenarios played in my head: her getting sick, her getting stuck in house fire, her getting hit by a car. I would not let any of it happen. I would make it my duty to protect her

More cars had piled up as others slowly and safely evaded us. The cars behind my Lexus swerved through oncoming traffic to pass. The sound of police sirens went off in the distance. We both turned to see where it was coming from and our eyes met. It was brief, lasting only seconds, but the electricity between us was unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

A police cruiser parked near the curb. I suppressed the panic building in my throat to speak. "Hello officer."

He ignored my pleasantry, eyes too busy scanning the surrounding scene. "What's going on here?"

"Nothing going on here," I responded on autopilot.

"Really?" I mindlessly nodded. "Then get out of the damn intersection." He gestured for us to move towards his cruiser.

I started to walk, but the woman wasn't budging. "We should go," I told her. She didn't move. "It's okay," I assured her and offered my hand. She took it… kind of. Our fingers didn't interlace. Her hand merely flopped over mine. Nevertheless, we remained connected throughout the entire journey across the street. We moved close enough to the officer that I could see the exhaustion in his eyes and make out the name "Perez" written on the right side of his chest.

Officer Perez returned to questioning. "How did you two end up over there?"

"I was driving and found her there." My explanation didn't seem sufficient for him. "She seemed lost. I was trying to help her."

His attention shifted to her. "Miss, what were you doing there?"

She moved to hide behind me. My heart fluttered at the amount of trust she had already instilled in me. "She's nervous," I explained.

"And how do you two know each other?"

"We don't." I immediately corrected myself. "We didn't know each other… but tonight, something special brought us together."

Officer Perez cocked his head to the side, struggling to follow. He scoffed. "Alright, I'm gonna need to see some identification."

I pulled my driver's license out of my wallet. As he glanced over my license, I turned around to look at the object of my affection and asked, "Do you have any ID on you?"

She stared blankly at me.

"Mr. Cullen, you're free to go. Just next time," he pointed at my car in the lane, "park your car before you try to play knight in shining armor."

"I'll be sure to keep that in mind." I lightly pulled the woman with me.

Officer Perez raised his hand. "Slow your roll. The lady's gonna have to come with me."

"Officer, ple—"

"Disrupting traffic is a crime. Someone could have gotten seriously injured tonight."

"She didn't mean any harm."

"We don't know who she is or where she came from." He shook his head. "She's coming with me to the station."

"If that's the case… then I'll go to the station too."

"Good. Drive your damn car out of the lane and we'll see you at the station."

I got in my car and followed the police cruiser to the station. Officer Perez had the woman sit in front of him for additional questions, not one of which got an answer. His frustration was growing increasingly apparent on his face.

"Maybe she doesn't speak English?" He narrowly opened the door behind him and peeked his head inside. "Mike, you know any Spanish?"

A deep, disembodied voice replied, "Hola, partner."

"Good enough." Officer Perez shrugged. "Get on out here."

Mike walked out "Buenos dias mucha—" His eyes bulged when he noticed the woman. "Hey, aren't you Chief Swan's girl? Isabella, right?"

The woman nodded. "Bella," she softly corrected.

I reveled in the sweet sound of her voice. "Bella," I repeated under my breath, wanting to feel my angel's name on my lips.

Officer Perez stood between Bella and Mike. His head turned back and forth, struggling to choose who to address first. He raised his eyebrows at Mike. "Chief Swan?"

"Used to work under him back in Burlington," Mike explained. "Maaaaan, Chief Swan scared the shit out of me back in the day. Haven't talked to him in a while, though. Heard he retired a few years back."

"You're telling me this woman," Officer Perez pointed directly at her large red suit, "this woman here that was wandering in the middle of an intersection with no identification is a cop's daughter?"

"Yeah," Mike confirmed, completely deadpan. "And she doesn't need to give identification. I just told you her name. Let the girl go home."

"She committed a crime."

"Fine, carry on. I still have Chief Swan's number. Give him a nice, late night call about his daughter's serial jaywalking." Mike patted his partner on the shoulder for good luck and headed back out the door where he came from. "Let me know how it goes," he taunted before the door clicked shut.

Officer Perez groaned. "Ma'am you're free to go. Do you know how you're getting home? Need me to give you a ride?"

I sat up from my seat. "I can take her home."

Officer Perez carefully gauged Bella's reaction. She nodded in agreement with unexpected enthusiasm. Still, Officer Perez watched us leave through the window. I opened the passenger seat door and could feel the gravitational pull between us as I helped her with the seatbelt. I couldn't help but wonder if she felt it too.

"Bella, I've never felt this way before. For some inexplicable reason, I need to be close to you. Being with you is the only thing that matters to me. As much as it will hurt to be away from you, I need to take you home." She bit her lower lip, and I suddenly found myself struggling to speak. I pulled out of the police station and onto the main road. "Bella, where do you live?"

No response.

Maybe I should try a different approach, one that involves less speaking. "Can you point in the direction I should turn?"

No response.

I clenched and unclenched my grip on the steering wheel, hesitating to ask my next question. "Do you have a home to go to?"

No response.

For once, I was thankful for her silence. I processed the moment and inhaled sharply. "Do you want to stay with me tonight?"

My shoulders scrunched up, worrying that I was being too forward, but what other option was there? At this point, the possibility of her running away screaming was unlikely. Be that as it may, I would hate to give her any reason to think ill of me. There are specific boundaries you shouldn't cross in new relationships, however unconventional. My attraction to her was instantaneous, but did Bella's experience mirror mine? Was it as intense as mine? Was it too soon for her to understand that there was no safer place than in my sight?

I felt her latch onto my wrist and allowed myself to take a peek in the direction of the passenger's seat. The pleading look in her eyes communicated everything I needed to know. "Okay, Bella. Let's go home."

A blush spread across her cheeks. I struggled to keep my eyes on the road. Her mere presence was bringing out my most primal desires. It was very...distracting. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed her fingers tap against the window.

"Would you like me to open that for you?" Of course, she didn't answer. Not verbally. But her fingers carried on with their tapping, and I rolled the window down. It must have been hot inside that large red suit. She stuck her head out of the window, letting her rosy cheeks bask in the cool air. She's free like the wind.

I parked my Lexus outside my apartment complex. Bella quietly followed me upstairs, hands tightly folded in front of her. The air between us grew tense. She stood several feet behind me as I slipped my key into the lock. Her expression was impassive, difficult to read. I invited her to walk in first and closed the door behind us.

When I turned around, she was standing overwhelmingly close to me, eyes narrow. My heart rate was beginning to accelerate as her sweet breath caressed my face. My hand ran down her arm, brushing against the soft, red feathers of her suit. My other hand ghosted over her smooth cheek. My face leaned into hers but stopped inches away from her lips, giving her a chance to fill in the gap. I closed my eyes, and her gentle lips found mine.

In a moment of pure bliss, her arms wrapped themselves around my neck. She used her newfound leverage to pull herself up and wrap her legs around my waist. The kiss grew deeper, more possessive. I could feel the tension rolling off her body. The fabric in my pants tightened. My hands hooked under her thighs, making room for subtle friction, and lifted her to my bedroom.

Her fingers eagerly roamed through my hair. I gently placed her on my bed and threw off my shirt. My lips graced the exposed skin of her neck until I reached her suit. My hands moved to free her from the confines of her suit. Her body stiffened beneath me. I lifted my head to get a proper view of her face. She was nervous, but the lust in her eyes matched mine.

My lips drew closer to her ear. "Please, I need to touch you."

She took a deep breath and relaxed against my chest. I lowered her red suit only slightly. There was something hard underneath it. Bella hid her face against my chest as I further pulled the zipper down, revealing her back brace.

"Bella," I whispered. I didn't know what I wanted her to say. An explanation, assurance that she wasn't in pain, a reason as to why she didn't tell me sooner. Anything would have sufficed. She pulled away and looked up at me with an underlying sadness, but there was no verbal response. Her lips crashed back on to mine, and in Bella-like fashion, she told me that she was okay.

I stripped the red suit off her body. Her delicious curves laid bare underneath me. As my hands hungrily explored her body, Bella is loud and down for anything.

I rose to my knees. "Now it's time for heavy petting."

She yanked my waistband and grabbed my throbbing erection, thus commencing heavy petting. She gave me no time to lie down and stroked me like it was her job. I wondered what she did for work until I came on her hands and lost all capacity to think.

I crashed on the bed and Bella gracefully fell on top of me. She straddled my waist, and fiercely grabbed my face with both hands. She leaned in and said, "I want you to do the mating press."

She rolled over on her back, her legs propped up. Her sweet nectar was visibly pooling between her legs. In one swift thrust, I buried my desire deep inside of her, instinctively moaning at the contact. It was met with a sharp gasp from her. Our hips moved in a frenzy and tongues battled for dominance. She buried her hands in my hair. Her walls clenched tighter and tighter around me.

In between labored breaths, she asked me, "If you come inside me, will you die?"

I groaned at the mental image of ejaculating so hard that my body becomes completely depleted of moisture. "It would be extremely painful."

"You're a big guy."

"For you," I grunted, and with two more harsh strokes, we came together.

I woke up with Bella in my arms. I brushed my hand along her delicate cheek. She stirred against me and looped her hand with mine to slowly bring it down to her hip. We lied in dark silence for some time in our own little piece of heaven. Light peaked out from the bedroom curtain. I separated myself from her to slowly pull the curtain back and let some daylight into the room.

I returned to her side to kiss the small patch of skin behind her ear. "Good morning, love. It's a beautiful day today. Care to join me for a walk?"

She glanced back at me, smiling shyly with her eyes squinting at the brightness. She pulled back slightly to stretch her arms. The bed sheet lowered, exposing her pale decolletage and back brace. She moved to retrieve her fluffy red suit from the floor.

"It's going to be hot out there. Let me grab you something cooler to wear." I squeezed her thigh through the sheets and fetched a pair of sweatpants and blue t-shirt out of my drawer. Her petite body looked adorable in my clothes. Unfortunately, none of my shoes would come close to fitting her tiny feet. Despite her willingness to go barefoot, I insisted on buying her a pair of comfortable shoes. Besides, we were both hungry and no shoes meant no service.

We sifted through the mom-and-pop shop next to my apartment complex. Bella was quick to choose a pair of white sandals, but her gaze kept drifting to the rack of sundresses across the store.

"You like those dresses?" She smiled with her head low, embarrassed by my observation. I grabbed her hand and walked her to the rack. "Which one is your favorite?" She pointed to one with a blue floral design. "It's beautiful. Almost as beautiful as you." I steered her into the fitting room, sundress in hand, and closed the curtain. I waited patiently on the other side, tapping my foot. Each second felt unbearably long.

My head spun at the rustling of the curtain.

This woman was a true test to my composure. The dress deliciously hugged both her womanly and spinal curves. The fabric ended just above her knees. I ogled her bare legs, recalling what they felt like under my fingertips.

My heart was beating erratically in my chest. Seeing Bella's body on display was overwhelming. I shakily handed the cashier my card. The cashier asked me a question, but that sundress had unplugged the cognitive wires in my brain.

Bella followed me out the door, walking almost shoulder to shoulder with me. Looking down at her gave me a perfect view of her chest. The cleavage that would have been exposed by the dress was covered by the back brace, but the fact that there would have been cleavage was tantalizing in its own right. I needed to distract myself.

"Do you like rice pudding?" She nodded. "Good. There's a cafe just a few blocks away."

We continued down the sidewalk, hand in hand. At the cafe, I ordered for the both of us and carried our food to an outside table.

"You have rice pudding on your face." My finger swiped across her cheek. Bella grabbed my wrist and licked my finger with utmost enthusiasm. God, I love this woman.

"Hello Edward," a familiar voice said from behind me. I turned around to see Victoria. When I didn't fondly greet her back, she pointed at Bella who still had my finger in her mouth. "Is this the friend you mentioned last night?"

"Um…" My train of thought was interrupted by Bella's slurping sounds. "Yeah."

Victoria's voice softened, "She is...just a friend, right?"

I wanted to tell her that it was none of her business, but we could end it all here. There was no harm in giving her an answer. Victoria couldn't take this sort of rejection personally. Surely Bella wouldn't be caught off guard by my acknowledgment. Our relationship was not a complicated one. Bella and I had exchanged more than enough words and bodily fluids.

"No, Victoria," I replied flatly. "She's much more than a friend."

A reluctant grin crept across her face. "Oh, I'm so happy for you." She began to turn around but stopped on her heel. "But what does she have that I don't?"

Bella released my finger from her mouth and looked directly at Victoria. "Rawr."

Victoria scoffed. "Psychopath with a back brace," she muttered as she walked away.

I slurped the rest of my bowl of rice pudding as to seem unbothered. Brushing off Victoria's comment did not come as easily for Bella. Tiny fingers self-consciously lingered over her back brace. The rest of her rice pudding remained untouched on the table. It was painful to watch her sit and sulk. I mustered up a smile. "Let's go home."

Upon entering my apartment, Bella stripped out of the floral sundress, shot for the bedroom, and changed back into her fluffy red suit. I kept my distance, figuring she wanted time to herself. By the time I checked in to see how she was doing, I found her fast asleep on the couch. She must have been exhausted. The long walk and passionate love making wore her out. I pulled a blanket over, feeling no such exhaustion. My stamina is very high.

I stalked back into the kitchen, unsure of how to keep busy. It was still Saturday. I started my usual routine for a relaxing weekend: sitting in bed with a book and replacing that book with some educational online videos. Neither were as fulfilling as they were last weekend. Even with the book in my lap, my mind couldn't stay on the page, and Hitomi Tanaka was a sweet lady but she wasn't her. I caught myself staring at the wall and shook my head. Bella had been in my life for less than a day and already I felt lonely without her.

Nothing satisfied me unless it involved Bella. Perhaps cooking a nice dinner for us to share would keep me occupied. It would be my first time cooking for two. There are two recipes I had practically perfected: spaghetti alfredo and sloppy joes. However, my kitchen was only stocked to prepare one serving of each. I could have Bella choose her dinner first and eat whatever dish was left, but then I wouldn't have any food left in my apartment.

I grabbed my keys and headed to the grocery store. Whenever I caught myself rushing through the aisles, I reminded myself that Bella was in a deep sleep. She likely wouldn't notice that I was gone.

On the way back, I stopped at the intersection where Bella and I first met. It was almost unrecognizable in the daylight. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted something in the bushes. It could have been nothing, but the same intuition that brought me to Bella told me to pull over and investigate.

Hiding ominously in the bushes was something round and red. The same shade of red as Bella's feathery suit. I picked it up with baited breath and turned it around. In my hands was the head of Times Square Elmo.

The pieces were all coming together. I packed my discovery into the passenger seat and drove home. My knuckles turned white from my tight grip on the steering wheel. A million thoughts racked my brain. Although the head spoke for itself there were still questions that I had and answers that I needed to hear her say. My fingers fumbled with my key to unlock the apartment door.

I heard Bella before I saw her. "Why leave?" she asked. She was sitting up on the couch, wide awake. Her eyes bulged when she noticed the head.

I stood in front of the couch. "Bella, I know what you are?"

She pulled the blanket over her head. "Say it. Out loud. Say it."

My breath hitched. "Times Square Elmo."

"...Are you mad?"

I slowly lowered myself next to her on the couch. "No. How did you get here all the way from Times Square?"

"Walked," she answered, voice partially muffled by the blanket.

"Why did you hide this from me?"

"People hate Times Square Elmo." I couldn't argue with that. She pulled the blanket from her head, revealing the tears in her eyes. "People hate Time Square Elmo. But Times Square Elmo no hate people."

"You don't have to do this," my voice trembled. "You can find a new job."

"No."

"You can! I can help you!" I took her hand and placed it over my heart.

"No." Bella pulled her hand away from my grasp and protectively wrapped it over her chest. Despite her thick red suit, which I now knew to be an Elmo costume, I knew she was touching directly over the start of her back brace.

"You like the suit because it covers your back brace."

"Comfy."

"There's no need to hide it."

"The girl."

I scoffed. "Victoria? You want to know why she said that? She's jealous because I think your back brace is beautiful." Bella looked at me, eyes wide in utter disbelief. "You're beautiful, Bella, and I love you for who you are and no matter what your job is." I leaned closer. "I want the best for you, and if being Times Square Elmo doesn't make you happy then I'll find you a job that will."

She pulled my mouth to hers for an all-encompassing kiss. I wanted to wash away the pain that was so deeply embedded inside her. I wanted to make her forget the back brace. I wanted to love her the way a woman deserves to be loved, doggy style. I carried her to the bedroom for another night of selfless passion and made love to her the way a responsible pet owner should.

Our Sunday consisted of more hot sex and sloppy joes. I regrettably stepped out of my apartment on Monday morning, realizing that it would be our first full day apart. The clock moved slower at the office. Every hour at work was an hour that could have been spent with Bella—would have been spent with Bella. Those hours would never be enough. I didn't just want to spend every hour with her but everyday for as long as I shall live.

I wanted to marry her. Despite the odd circumstances under which we met, I wanted to marry her in the most traditional way, white dress and all.

I waited for lunch to dial our local police station's number. "Hello, this is Edward Cullen. I visited the station on Friday." Visiting, no need for further detail. "Is Mike in?"

"Speaking," his response was clipped and professional.

I cleared my throat. "The woman that was with me...I'm in love with her, and I want to make her my wife."

"Congrats but this is a police station. You're gonna have to take that up with the county clerk's office."

"We will, but that's not the reason I'm calling. Correct me if I'm wrong but I believe you mentioned that you have her father's phone number?"

"I do but what makes you think I'll give it to you?" I stuttered into the receiver until he bursted into a fit of laughter. "Alright, kid. You got a pen and paper?"

I thanked Mike and then hesitated before making what could be the most important phone call of my life. Chief Swan answered with a "Who's this?"

"My name is Edward Cullen. I'm an accountant," Get to the point, I nagged myself. "I wanted to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage." Retrospectively, introducing myself and asking to marry his daughter in the same breath was not my proudest decision.

There was a long pause on the other side of the phone. "Marriage, huh?"

"Yes, sir. I love Bella."

"I see…"

I scratched my head. Loving her is a start, but it's not good enough. "Chief Swan, I love Bella, and I want to protect her and give her the happiest life imaginable. I promise to take care of her no matter what happens to her back."

"You're going to have to come here in person before you get an answer out of me."

Chief Swan gave me the address to his home in rural Connecticut. I walked up his doorstep in my nicest suit with my hair slicked back in a way that no adoring father could resist, but the man at the door was not the adoring father I had anticipated. He's shirtless, dark skinned and young, possibly younger than Bella.

I looked down at his jorts and apologized. "Sorry, I must have the wrong address."

"No, you don't. You're Edward. Came to see Chief Swan, right?

"That's correct."

"Come in." He propped the front door open with his sandal wearing foot and locked the door behind us. I scanned the surrounding rooms for Chief Swan, but it appeared as if there was nobody but us in the house. The boy sensed my confusion. "Do you know who I am?"

I shook my head. "I'm sorry."

"Jacob. You may not know me but Bella does. Bella and I know each other very well." He laughed to himself. "And then you come in with your monkeysuit, thinking that you can just take her from me. How can you marry her when you barely know her?"

"I know her better than you think."

"Then how did you not know that her dad died last year."

My mouth hung open. "That can't be."

"Yeah, Chief Swan is dead. Bella may have inherited his money, but I inherited his cell phone." I took a step away from Jacob and further into the house. Jacob just stood in front of me, menacingly. "What makes you think you deserve Bella."

"I can give her the beautiful life she deserves."

Jacob stepped into the kitchen, arms dangerously close to the block of knives on the counter. He grabbed a knife and waved it. "That's impossible. Don't you see? She can't be with you. She's a free spirit. You're an accountant."

He charged towards me. Without the advantage of a knife, I was left defenseless but not hopeless. I opened every drawer within reach in search of a weapon. The first drawer was filled with rags that I desperately threw. The second one contained silverware but nothing comparable to the blade in Jacob's hand. I threw the silverware and opened a third drawer. Inside was a manilla envelope labeled "SPINAL X-RAYS."

My curiosity had peaked. Jacob slipped on a floor spoon, buying me time to grab the envelope and run into the next room.

There were two x-rays inside the envelope. One was labeled "Bella" and the other was labeled "Jacob." Only one of those spines was curved and it was not the spine I had expected.

Jacob limped closer to me, still recovering from my spoon attack. "It's all over, Edward Cullen. Don't worry, I'm sure Bella will get over her dead boy toy."

"That's where you're wrong! It appears the hospital made a mistake. All this time Bella thought she had scoliosis but it was you, Jacob, that had scoliosis all along." I shoved the X-ray in Jacob's face. Jacob's spine disintegrated.

I caught my breath. I had won the battle but not the war. I came to Burlington to do one thing and I would not leave until it was done. I took the manilla envelope and drove to Burlington's only graveyard. I kneeled in front of Chief Swan's grave and wrote a note on the back of a drugstore receipt I found in my glove compartment.

Can I have your daughter's hand in marriage?

[ ] YES

[ ] NO

Clearly, I had not prepared for this when I left the house this morning. I watched the wind majestically blow my note away. "That's right, God. Wind that letter up to heaven."

Back at home, Bella was wearing the sundress and watching paid programming on television. She rushed to greet me at the door. "Hi, Edward."

"There's something important I have to tell you." She trembled back in fear. "Don't worry. It's good news," I assured her and gently rubbed her back. I pulled her x-ray from the manilla envelope. "Your spine is perfect. You don't need to wear the back brace."

"But I like the back brace."

I raised my eyebrows. "You do?"

"Mhm." She tucked the x-ray back into the envelope. "You said that my back brace is beautiful."

I kissed her on the cheek and walked into the kitchen. "What do you want for dinner?"

She did not have to think much before she answered, "Spaghetti alfredo."

I opened the refrigerator and frowned. "We only have stuff for sloppy joes." But I'm a man who provides for my woman. If she wants spaghetti alfredo then spaghetti alfredo she shall receive.

I drove to the grocery store and bought the essential ingredients: the spaghetti and the alfredo. After parking my Lexus back at my apartment complex, I noticed a paper falling from the sky at record speed for paper. I ran to catch it. It was my drugstore receipt note with the YES box checked. An engagement ring was taped to it, weighing it down and causing it to be hurled towards the Earth.

I returned to my apartment a happy man. "Bella, I have an important question for you. Well, two important questions."

Bella curiously stood in front of me. I got down on one knee. "Bella Swan, will you marry me?"

She nodded. I slipped the sky ring onto her finger, grabbed her tightly around the waist, and spun her around. After I put her down, she asked, "What's the second question?"

"How do you feel about anal?"


End file.
